Jun 10, 2014

Divorced in your 20's


   I found this article on allgroanup.com called "Hello, I'm a Twentysomething and divorced" and thought this would be great topic to chime in on.
     From my personal perspective of getting married at 21 and now going through a divorce at 29. I can agree to the feeling of being the first within your friends to get married. I remember when my husband proposed on Valentines Day although I knew that he would I was so excited to tell my best friends and thought everyone would be so happy for me. I quickly learned that wasn't the case, people couldn't believe I was getting married so young. While most of my friends were getting ready for their second year of college, pledging for sororities and applying for summer internships. I was working a full-time job and planning a wedding. 

  As time past and life happens ultimately our marriage did not make it. So now at 29 when my friends are getting married I'm once again on a different level that many of my friends cannot really relate to. Going through the process of a divorce who gets what. Digesting that the last 10 years of your life has been invested into something that has failed and taking the responsibility for my actions and mistakes. I think the hardest thing is telling family and friends that its not working and having to start over not to mention how expensive and difficult the process can be especially when you have children involved. 
     I however remain optimistic about the future. I look forward to healing and taking out so much needed me time to reflect, build my spirit and to grow. My focus now my child and to make sure this divorce affects her as little as possible (you would be surprised how much children really know whats going on). Working on me physically, mentally and spiritually. I think this is very important to be selfish and get "me" together. ( I will write a separate blog post about how I let myself go during this marriage). It's important that I don't allow this divorce to taint my views and perspective of men, it's important that I learn from my mistakes but I refuse to allow them to alter my character forgiving and most importantly LET GO. 

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